內容介紹
「活下去的理由不一定多麼偉大,有時候只是一杯咖啡的溫度。」
本書的開篇即作者回憶她在二十四歲時第一次的自殺嘗試,這一事件成為她後續人生的轉折點,使她不得不接受住院治療,並開始思考自己的心理健康狀況。從那時起,她不斷地與憂鬱症搏鬥,嘗試各種治療方法,面對醫療體系的諸多挑戰。作者以誠實直白的筆觸,描述人生最低潮的時刻,這樣的坦誠令人震撼,也能讓曾經有類似經歷的讀者產生共鳴。她的故事證明,即便是聰明、有成就的專業人士,也可能深陷憂鬱的泥沼,這本書打破了關於精神疾病的刻板印象,讓更多人願意面對並討論這個議題。
「我從來沒有遇到過什麼可怕的事情,導致我被自殺的意志吞噬。我有一個支持我、愛我的家庭,我有一個快樂的童年。我是個很幸運的人。唯一的問題是,我恨我自己,我想死。」
這本書不僅僅是作者自己的故事,身為一名資深記者,她熟稔調查報導專業,挖掘憂鬱症治療的現狀與挑戰,進一步採訪了許多精神疾病患者、醫生、科學家等,研究了世界各地的治療方式和政策,將這些專業見解與自身經歷結合,兼具專業性與可讀性,讓讀者了解憂鬱症患者在求助時所遭遇的困難與治療憂鬱症的醫學進展。
《抱歉,我想死。你有辦法幫我嗎?》值得所有關心心理健康的人一讀,不論你曾受憂鬱症所苦,或是身邊有親友正在經歷這一切,又或者只是想深入了解這個日益受關注的議題,這本書都能帶來許多寶貴的啟發。在這個仍然對心理健康抱有許多誤解與偏見的社會,本書更提醒我們應該用同理心與知識,去關心那些正在與憂鬱症奮鬥的人。
「我還活著,這不是勝利,但至少是個開始。」
本書涵蓋的話題包括:
憂鬱症的生理與心理機制
自殺意念的根源及預防措施
精神疾病的社會污名化與誤解
醫療體系現有缺陷,如冗長的候診時間與藥物治療的副作用等
心理治療的有效性與限制
作者介紹
書評
"As gripping a memoir as it is a commanding work of journalism. With a scope that ranges from intimate to panoramic, Anna Mehler Paperny expands outward from her own struggles with suicidal thoughts to explore the dizzying array of medical anti-depression treatments that are available around the world. Personable and passionate―and full of raucous, life-affirming humor―the book casts much-needed light on one of the most persistent and mystifying diseases of our time. This is an urgent read in societies such as ours, where, directly or otherwise, everyone’s life is increasingly affected by depression."
― 2019 Hilary Weston Writers’ Trust Prize for Nonfiction Jury (Ivan Coyote, Trevor Herriot, and Manjushree Thapa)
"I learned so much from [Hello I Want to Die Please Fix Me] about depression, its history, its treatment, and avenues for solutions. You’ll learn a great deal too from her engaging, and funny, and courageous book."
― Jackie Wolf, NPR’s Lifespan podcast
"Journalist Mehler Paperny offers a startling and intimate portrait of her multiple attempts at suicide and digs into the disturbingly inadequate ‘toolbox’ available to individuals suffering from acute depression. . . .This earnest and informative volume serves as a frank guide for those dealing with depression."
― Publishers Weekly, starred review
"Told with intimate understanding and heartwrenching humor, the book sheds some much-needed light on the far-reaching impacts of this unpredictable mental illness."
― Book Riot
"Well-researched, engaging, and highly readable. . . . An eye-opening and humane book treatment of a difficult subject."
― Kirkus Reviews
"This book documents [Paperny’s] effort to become acquainted with depression, for the sake of herself and others. She is a fine tour guide, with a reporter’s rigour, strong narrative skills and self-deprecating humour."
― Toronto Star
"Raw, frank and dark-humored. It’s not a story of redemption or triumph. . . . But, in its unpretentiousness, the book is a must-read for those who want to understand what goes on in the heads of those who take their own lives each year . . . and the multiples more who, like the author, come perilously close. Ms. Mehler Paperny does a masterful job of delving into the complexities of living with depression, the challenges of getting the help you need and why it’s so difficult to prevent suicide."
― The Globe and Mail
"In this courageous and honest book, Anna Mehler Paperny plumbs the depths of her own acute depression, and also investigates the cultural, social, and historical discourse around despair. She writes with a stunning fluency that belies the narrative’s underlying pain. This is an insightful and important book."
― Andrew Solomon, author of The Noonday Demon
"This is such an important book. . . . Paperny writes with urgency and intensity because she’s tapping into an essential truth: Everyone deserves dignified mental health care, but systemic injustices create huge discrepancies in how people are treated. I learned so much from this engaging, well-researched, courageous book. It belongs in the canon of ‘must-reads’ to understand mental health treatment today."
― Mark Lukach, author of My Lovely Wife in the Psych Ward
"[Paperny’s] skill as a journalist is evident both in the seamless ease with which she moves from one topic to another and in her ability to break down complex ideas into accessible and engaging prose. . . . It’s hard to imagine any group of people who wouldn’t benefit in some way from reading this book. Those who have been through the system will feel less alone in their experiences, and those who haven’t will gain necessary insight into what it’s like. Paperny ends not with the story of a triumphant recovery or a miraculous cure, but a call to arms: let’s fix this broken system. Her work will go a long way toward helping readers understand just how vital that need is."
― Quill and Quire
"The world needs more Anna Mehler Papernys, not fewer. Brave, compassionate, insightful, and wincingly self-aware. Ready to challenge convention, hold feet to the fire, to ‘punch in the face with words,’ as she puts it in her book . . . Anna has announced herself as one of the most tenaciously curious working journalists, working minds, that we have."
― Ian Gill, The Tyee
"Anna Mehler Paperny illuminates the dark corners of suicide and depression with wit and tenacity. Both an extraordinary work of journalism and a poignant, harrowing―and occasionally funny―memoir. Hello I Want to Die Please Fix Me is fearless and necessary."
― Don Gillmor, author of To the River: Losing My Brother
"Compelling . . . a very good book. People coping with depression will find it supportive as well as entertaining―Anna has a great sense of humor. I also think it will help educate the public."
― Dr. Marcia Valenstein, MD, MSc, psychiatrist at University of Michigan Hospitals and Veterans Affairs Ann Arbor Healthcare System
"A remarkable book. . . . I am just so impressed by Anna’s honesty and rigor, her courage, her thorough research, her insight, her wisdom and her sense of humor. I hugely admire what she has achieved. I am sure it will be a great help to many people, and I have come away with new understanding after reading her book."
― Dr. Irfan Dhalla, MD, MSc, vice president of Health Quality Ontario, St. Michael’s Hospital
"Anna’s the best journalist I know. Her story about the mental health care–system, as seen through her own experience, is an act of monumental bravery. This is a book that will save lives."
― Omar El Akkad, author of American War
得獎紀錄
Finalist for the 2019 Hilary Weston Writers’ Trust Prize for Nonfiction
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